Showing posts with label stupid excerpts from my brain. Show all posts
Showing posts with label stupid excerpts from my brain. Show all posts

Saturday, February 18, 2012

letting go.


She pulled open the last draw of the chest with a grunt. She'd have to fix the darn thing, the sides always stuck before giving away to the force. 

The blue and white notebook sat there atop a pile of journals from the past. 
The hesitation was minuscule, and she lifted it out.

She remembered giving it to him on the last day of school. 
They'd boasted about long lengths, dared him to write more. 
And to her surprise, he actually had.
His pages spilled love and hope and happiness. 
He was a terrible writer but his words were honest. There was no elegance but oh- so much heart. 
She read it once again, from the very beginning. 
The letter of sorts spoke of so much, promised a ton and then some.
She smiled a sad smile as she tore the pages out. 
If only time could have frozen in that dark room, that warm, dark night.

Sunday, February 12, 2012

of broken dreams

She looks at him, laughing with her and she shuts her eyes. 


This too shall pass.


She edits the party pictures, then deletes them. One by one.
He wont tell her how beautiful she is, so what then, is the point?


This too shall pass.


She cries in great gasps and hiccups and pain. Her eyes become bloodshot and swollen as she reads his last goodbye. 
They leak, of love lost and heartache gained.

This too, shall pass.

She reaches up and grabs the person telling her it will be okay. As she slowly strangles him, she laughs a crazed laugh.

It needs to pass now.

Monday, December 5, 2011

Truth in cliches.

She looked at him, smiling at Her. He was enthralled by her grace and lightness. The way she flipped her hair, and looked up shyly through her eyelashes, the way she laughed, a girlish caress to the wind, the way she believed in what he did.
Because the beliefs they both had in common were the most important thing. That was the first thing he looked for now. Never again would he make the mistake of falling for the wrong girl.
He pushed away the ugly thought, tinged with just the right amount of discomfort and a pinch of pain.
It was a new day, a new him. He had chosen his path, he had done what was best for him, and he had convinced himself that what he was doing was okay. It was the right thing to do.
For him, anyway.
He took a sip from his non-alcoholic beverage and concentrated on the conversation.
It was, if he was honest with himself, a bit tiring to be constantly chipper and his jaw had developed a bit of an ache due to all the forced smiles. It wasn't that she was boring, it was just that she wasn't that interesting.

She saw his eyes glaze over for a few seconds and the pain in her heart lessened the tiniest bit.
Why could she not be happy for him? He'd clearly moved on, was visibly happy for her and played the cool card whenever they had a chance to catch up.
He was obviously made of tougher stuff than she. She saw him lean closer and point at Her face.
She felt nauseous. The girl laughingly said something, and he gently brushed her cheek with a tissue.
The black mark that she'd taken for a mole fell away, and as they stared into each others eyes, a tear worked its way into the corner of hers.

She stood up.
She had had enough.
She would not torture herself anymore.
He had led her on, made her feel special, then dumped her as soon as the other girl had made an appearance.
He had used her until the better package had come along- and even though she knew she was being unfair- they had technically agreed on everything- she wanted him, like she had all those years ago.
Was in love with him, and did not know how to cure it.
'Love' had been a sharp slap in her face.
Something that bruised her insides and made her crazy.
She knew it existed somewhere, but clearly not for her.
Would she ever feel this way again about someone?
She was afraid of the answer.
She did not want to be a jealous, selfish, shell of a person.
They say time is the best healer of wounds. They probably never had their heart stamped on until it was in smithereens.
She shook her head, dabbing at her eyes.
She reluctantly acknowledged that she would have let him go completely for a while, if she wanted her thoughts to stop doing a horrible dance around his being.
She had to give time a shot.

As she walked out of the cafeteria, he looked up and caught her eye.
She did not smile.
Neither did he.

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

The rate of change of momentum of a body.

I stared at the paper, clenching my pencil hard in my sweaty hand.
'Define Force.' was the simple question and my brain was thinking hard of its not-so-simple answer.
Force... force... that's mass into acceleration... but whats the definition? 
I looked up yet again, squinting at the large clock some ten feet away from me. Three minutes till I could kiss Physics goodbye forever. Three minutes were all that stood between me and that last precious mark.
I read and re-read the stupid line, hoping for a clue in the repetition.
What had my notebook said about force?
I knew its base units and I'd learned its formulas. The SI units had been memorized and burnt into my retina and brain since Olevels, 2009.
But what about the blasted precise.CIE.definition?
I took a deep breath, scrawled down a cursed sentence and she cleared her throat.
My three minutes were up, she told us.
I was free, was what she meant.


*Of course, in real life, I wrote the wrong definition and I still have a lot of exams left.